Out Of Focus

Expert's solution to Manila's traffic

Mon, 06/24/2013 - 12:46

by Alan Robles

The solution to Metro Manila's horrendous traffic and floods is simple: live in Australia.

This was the key finding in a study presented yesterday by self-proclaimed urban planner Dick Langtrabaho

According to Langtrabaho, "it's conclusive -- the best way to deal with Manila's terrible gridlock is to live in Oz."

He said he had chosen that particular country for a "very" logical reason -- "because I say so."

Let's raise politicians!

Fri, 02/25/2011 - 00:00

Hello to all our viewers out there. For today's show we'll learn how to start a small business raising an animal which is very much in demand these days.

I'm talking of course, about the politician. The market for this creature is huge - why even as we speak, they're being bought and sold all over the country!

How do we cash in on this boom? Before we go into that, look here, I bet you never knew these animals could be so companionable. Look, isn't this one cute and cuddly?

Throw out the clowns

Tue, 03/20/2007 - 00:00
Our folklore is populated by frightful, bizarre monsters. For instance, there's the aswang, a shape-changing horror which eats human fetuses and runs for public office. Or the amaranhig, an undead creature which tickles victims to death and runs for public office. Or the tikbalang, a horse-headed humanoid that attacks unwary travelers and runs for public office.

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